Tag Archives: Jesus

Waiting and Lamenting

Posted in food, gratitude, life by

For whatever reason, I don’t love liturgical experiences. I can be ok with liturgy in some contexts, but I usually find it too confining, too structured for my heart to feel at home in.

There. I said an uncool thing.

Even so, I love following the church calendar. Especially I love following the seasons of Advent and Lent. Western Christianity tends toward appearing glossy, smooth, smiley, and satisfied, and it tends to not account for or acknowledge the crazy hard, bewildering, unfair parts of life. It sings “trust and obey, for there’s no other way to be happy in Jesus” but I often wonder–what does ‘happy in Jesus’ even mean?

And if you sing more of that song, you come to “Not a shadow can rise, not a cloud in the skies, but His smile quickly drives it away” and you think, “Well… it’s not always been that quickly for me.” However, sloppy theology in songs is another subject for a braver day.

Advent and Lent give 28-40 long days to sit with the unaskable questions we hold. Advent and Lent let us name our hopes and fears, our anxieties and obsessions, and our longings in a dark season that is aching for the light of Christmas and Easter. These generous weeks in the church calendar give us space to lament–an essential part of the human experience–at least for the human who wants to be whole and healthy.

Lament is not a pity party or a sob story that wallows in misery. Lament is a gutsy wail that says not all is as it should be and I don’t like it and this stinks. People who deserve babies can’t conceive and people who deserve to die keep on living and people who deserve to live suddenly die and none of it’s fair or right or beautiful.

Maybe you thought being happy in Jesus means never saying any of this out loud and especially not to God. But if you can’t name your questions and put words to what feels grossly unfair, what does ‘healthy relationship’ even mean?

The difference between lament and self-pity is that lament turns toward Jesus and self-pity turns inward and spirals down. Lament goes somewhere with its sorrow and it wrestles and groans, sometimes for a very long time. It does not insist on always being polished and presentable and it does not follow a timeline.

But lament is a season, even though it doesn’t listen to any kind of time limit. Christmas and Easter come at the end of that season, and they remind us that it won’t always be winter, barren, dark.

Lament howls around for however long it needs to but because it turns toward Jesus, it finds comfort and soothing–eventually. This is a deep knowing, a solid confidence, a quivering consolation in the person who knows so much about grief that He’s called the “Man of Sorrows.” You can hold that reality close forever, and you have my permission to never sing “happy in Jesus” again.

If we’re honest with ourselves, we’re not always happy, and we are all waiting. We are waiting for many joys that Jesus also longs for. Just because He’s God doesn’t mean He gets what He’s waiting for either.

When Lucy met Mr. Tumnus in Narnia, he told her that it’s always winter and never Christmas. I think about that these days on my walks in the icy cold and I hear a stream trickling under the snow. The sound tells me that Aslan is on the move and Christmas–joy and feasting and merriment–is coming, and I don’t only mean smoked salmon at breakfast and turtle cheesecake for second breakfast.

This last night of Advent, I wish for you bright, shining tomorrows and the dripping of ice even in your lamenting, even in your waiting.

Related post: Hope Opens Every Door

On Eating Books

Posted in books, life, words by

A couple days ago,  a friend emailed to ask my opinion about several Christian books and their critiques. She heard they had questionable messages, and didn’t want her  family or her concept of Jesus to be destroyed by the books’ messages.

The question touched a nerve for me, and I fired back a reply. This is the edited form of what I answered, without names or titles, because those aren’t the point of this post:

I think it’s fair to say that some book isn’t my style, or that it doesn’t speak into this season of  my life. But being a writer who has been treated respectfully but also criticized, I am reeeeeeally slow to say that someone shouldn’t read another Christian’s book. My premise is Jesus’ words: “He that is not with me is against me.” Anything can be taken out of context, misunderstood, applied in wrong ways. There ARE wolves in sheep’s clothing. The enemy IS out to seek, kill, and destroy. But  books that focus on Jesus and how to get to know Him better have to be a good thing.

I don’t think we have to be scared of these books. The Spirit is a communicator. He will tell us if the fruit of the books are wrong or bad. Has the fruit/result of the book benefited you and your family? Then thank God for sharing His truth and light. No one produces light/truth on their own–it all comes from God and the praise should go back to Him and be spread to our world.
There’s going to be error in any book we read. That’s a given. Parents should protect their children; families definitely need to be a safe place to shelter children because there is evil out there. But somewhere, somehow (don’t ask me how parents should do this–it’s not my job!) children should grow to be adults who can DISCERN–key word here–what’s good and what’s not. Reading should be like eating fish–get the goodness out of it and spit out the bones.
I believe in universal truth and beauty, which means that non-believers can say and do things that are true and beautiful, mirroring God’s image in them, and testifying to the fact that satan cannot bring anything original, or create anything. Everything that comes from him is deception in some way, a twisting/perverting/distorting of the original stamp of beauty and truth that God gives to every person.
Christians have a higher call than only to mirror universal truth, because we are to be light in darkness and salt for insipidness. We are to teach and disciple and equip. Writing books is one way of doing that. It is ill-fitting for Christians to throw rocks or try to debunk other Christians who are sincerely trying to be voices that teach and equip and encourage. It is really dangerous to judge another Christian’s motivation or level of sincerity.
Where there is obvious sinful teaching that is not repented of, there is cause for caution and concern. (And ironically here, the internet is not the most reliable source of truth.) Where there is blatant falsehood or open defiance of God’s word or where good is called evil and evil is called good–these are reasons for not buying a book or not encouraging others to read it. There are spiritual powers and battles around us that we easily forget, and we should know that what we read and say has direct influence on the spirit world, for good or evil. BUT we should not be paranoid or flailing at bookshelves to make sure that no evil thing is in any book.
Is our faith in our expertise/wisdom/discernment, or is our faith in the Lord and His spirit and His endless faithfulness?
Will He or won’t He let us stray?
Are we or aren’t we safe in His hand?
Does a Christian author really have the power to take our faith away and turn us and our family off the narrow path of life?
If we ask God to guide us, and if our hearts are clear before Him, He will not accuse us. Satan is the accuser. The Spirit is faithful to convict. The peace of God is our umpire and can call the shots and tell us if something is wrong or dangerous. If our hearts are soft and sensitive to His gentle, loving voice, we don’t have to be scared that He will let us slip and swallow poison. His heart toward us is to keep us faultless, not to catch us making a mistake and jump on us!
I think _________’s book is a powerful message to this generation. I believe strongly that her wisdom is from God and echoes His heart. I think she is an anointed woman for this time in history, and I think she and her family have special temptations and attacks that no one else knows about because satan hates her kind of message, and her kind of family and marriage.
It is really wrong for Christians to attack each other.  Even when there is obvious error, we should be the ones who can speak honestly about it while handing out equal amounts of grace and forbearance.   Christians fail each other, and some Christian writers fail terribly. They carry a great responsibility (to whom much is given, much is required) but it is not a fellow Christian’s place to accuse and debunk. We should be known for our love and wisdom and grace, not our rigidity and harshness.
People liked spending time with Jesus, and I’m sure it was because of how much He lived in grace and truth. He is my hero and I want to live and read like that too.

Related post: Comments on The Jesus I Never Knew